What Would You Do If Your Child Became You (As A Bettor)?

Conor that's really insightful man.

The example overrides the advice every time.

We can say "don't do this" but if we're doing it in front of them every day the message received is the opposite.
 
My dad smoked.

Told me never to smoke.

I never smoked.

But he also wasn't on his phone betting constantly when I was growing up.

Maybe the visibility of betting is the problem.

Kids see it. Constantly. And it looks exciting.
 
Taffy correct about visibility.

Smoking visible but contextually isolated. Kitchen, garden, after meals.

Betting: phone always present. Dinner table. Car. Sofa. Bedroom.

No escape from the example.

Children absorb omnipresent behavior as normal.
 
Okay I called my sister.

Told her betting isn't as fun as I make it look.

Told her I've lost nearly two thousand dollars.

She was quiet for a second then said "oh."

Then she said she'd been planning to sign up when she got paid.

I told her not to.

I don't know if she'll listen but I said it.
 
Princess actually did the thing we're all saying we'd do but can't.

Because she's not trapped in the pattern yet.
 
Legend Princess.

Genuinely.
 
Back to the original question though: would you intervene?

Or would you teach them "proper" betting and tell yourself that's responsible?

Because I can see myself doing the second one and calling it parenting.
 
This is the rationalization trap.

"I will teach them correctly so they don't make my mistakes."

Translation: I will pass on the addiction with better methodology.

The methodology is not the problem. The compulsion is.

Teaching systematic betting to someone predisposed to compulsion is not protection. It is training.
 
Klaus that's the uncomfortable truth.

Teaching them to bet "right" is still teaching them to bet.

The edge case where they genuinely have the temperament for it is rare.

Easier to assume they don't.
 
I've thought about this.

If my son grows up and becomes a disciplined profitable bettor like Eddie - technically I should be proud.

But I'd still worry. Because I was once disciplined and profitable and it still cost me things I can't measure on a spreadsheet.

There's no version of "my child bets seriously" that I'm fully comfortable with.
 
at least you lot have something to teach... if my hypothetical kid followed my example theyd just be a mess...

no methodology to pass on... just chaos and damage...

honestly the best thing about not having kids is they cant inherit this from watching me...
 
Conor mate.
 
Conor I would suggest the absence of children is not the comfort you think it is, the example we set exists beyond our own families, we normalize betting behavior in public, online, in conversations, the cultural permission we implicitly grant by being visible bettors affects people beyond our immediate circle, but yes, I understand what you mean and there is something to it.
 
Okay real talk. For those with kids: have you ever actually talked to them honestly about betting?

Not "don't do what I do." But actually explaining what it's done to you?
 
No.

And I don't know why.

Maybe because explaining it honestly means admitting things I'm not ready to say out loud to my son.
 
Same.

Easier to say "betting's fun but be careful" than to say "it's eaten twelve years of my evenings and I don't know how to stop."
 
Have not had honest conversation with children about betting.

They know I do it. They do not know what it costs.

Telling them would require admitting the cost.

Admitting the cost would require confronting why I continue despite knowing it.

Cannot confront that. So say nothing meaningful.
 
Silence is its own message.

Children observe everything. Draw conclusions regardless.

Silence about betting while clearly doing it constantly communicates: this is normal, this is what adults do, this is acceptable.

Worse than saying nothing would be saying one thing while doing another.

Which is what everyone here does.
 
Oli that's bleak but accurate.

The message is being sent. We're just not controlling it.
 
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