Do You Have a Number That Would Make You Quit Gambling Forever?

[TaffyTipster]

Prof I don't know what to say.

 

[ParlayPrincess_88]

Prof

 

[FadeThePublic]

"A wall with a number written on it."

Prof that's going to stay with me.

The number needs a picture behind it to function as an exit.

Without the picture it's just arithmetic.

 

[SharpEddie47]

The shared number is the version that could actually work.

Two people with the same picture of what comes after.

One person alone with a number can always renegotiate with themselves.

Two people with an agreement have something to honor beyond the number itself.

Prof had the version that could have held.

Lost the thing that made it hold.

 

[Klaus]

Have not shared my number with my wife.

Reading this thread I am understanding why that matters.

A number she doesn't know is a number I can change unilaterally.

A number she knows is a commitment with a witness.

I have been keeping it private for reasons I told myself were about not worrying her.

Perhaps actually about preserving the right to move it.

 

[CoachTony_Bets]

Klaus that's honest.

The privacy isn't protection.

It's insurance against having to honor the number.

 

[DublinDegen]

never had a shared number with anyone...

but the therapist question is sitting with me...

what would fill the space...

slowly getting some answers to that...

small ones...

but more than i had before...

 

[TaffyTipster]

Good Conor.

Small answers are still answers.

 

[oli_sussex]

The number question is the wrong question.

The right question is what comes after.

If that picture exists and is specific and is shared with someone: the number might hold.

If the picture is vague or private or imagined alone: the number will move.

Nobody in this thread has the full set of conditions.

Some of us are closer than others.

 

[SharpEddie47]

Twenty years in.

I've passed my own number.

I have no clear picture of what comes after.

I have nobody I've shared the number with.

And I'm still looking at Sunday's lines.

This thread didn't make me feel better about that.

But it made me understand it more clearly than I did this morning.

That's probably something.

 

[FadeThePublic]

The horizon moved again for me while reading this thread.

At least now I know why I keep walking toward it.

 

[ParlayPrincess_88]

I'm going to think about the picture.

Not the number. The picture.

What would be in it.

Starting there feels more honest than picking a number I'd probably just move anyway.

 

[TaffyTipster]

The number we all think is the answer.

Turns out it's the question we're using to avoid the actual answer.

 

[DublinDegen]

yeah...

been thinking about the after for a while now...

the number would have been easier...

the after is harder...

but i think the after is the right problem to be working on...

slowly...

 

[Klaus]

Will tell my wife the number this week.

Not because it will make me stop.

But because keeping it private is now something I cannot justify to myself.

Small step. Possibly meaningless.

But the private number has been too comfortable for too long.

 

[CoachTony_Bets]

Klaus that matters.

A witness changes what a number is.

Good thread everyone.

Going to think about what picture I'm actually trying to reach.

Not the number in front of it.

The thing behind it.